Regional Staff Conference

I had a great time last week at our Regional Staff Conference. I got to help plan our annual Christmas party this year. Our theme: The League of Failed Superheroes. Check out some pictures below!

I know I shouldn't reveal this, but since you're reading my blog I think I can trust you. My mild-mannered alter ego, Carolyn Boatsman, is just a facade. I'm trying to launch my career as a super hero. I'm really the Curly Q. I can curl anything - my hair, ribbons, the patterns on fabric. I even have slinkies for weapons!

We always have White Elephant Musical Chairs. My staff partner, Jeff, who works with Asian American IV, is fighting it out with Jon, who staffs an Asian American fellowship over at that other school (University of Texas for those of you who aren't familiar with the rivalry).

Jeff won. By taking it to the ground. That's dedication.

Every year we also have very intense competitions between our areas. Here, Heidi, our regional administrator, is competing in Jenga, at the last table standing.

Besides the awesome party, we also rested, caught up with each other, and learned our new regional vision: Missio Dei: Going with the God of Mission. Pretty cool. We'll focus on growth (more Small Groups and chapters), development (making disciples and developing staff), and mission (changing a city, a nation, and our worldview).

Some of our regional leadership team trained us on "apprentices" as a new way of discipling students and raising up leaders. We usually meet with a student for an hour every week, talking about life and praying or studying Scripture. This new way has students seeing what it's like to prepare and lead a Small Group and then having the leader challenge the apprentice to some action step - sharing the gospel, reading some Scripture, leading Small Group the next week. It ends up being the same time commitment for the leader, but hopefully will grow fruit a little quicker or more consistently in the apprentice. We'll see!

Talking about Truth

I'll be at Regional Staff Conference today through Friday. I'm excited to learn more about discipling students, hear what's been going on around Texas, Arkansas, and Oklahoma, and most importantly, beat the other areas at our annual Christmas party competition.

Andrea Thomas, Meg (one of the students I'm discipling), and I got to have a few spiritual conversations with non-Christians last week. Of course, we always run into a lot of Christians on campus, but that's when we switch over to "conversational discipleship" - checking to see how they're growing and praying for them. But we usually get into some great conversations with non-Christians, too. Andrea and Meg got to talk to a Taiwanese Ph.D. student who is attending church and seriously considering the gospel. Meg and I got to talk with an agnostic student who didn't want to look for or consider what truth might be - there are lots of roads, and you can't know, and people who think you can are the really awful people, and she wished they would just shut up. Her indifference was palpable. She kept talking with us, though, and she was honest, which was nice. It was beautiful to see Meg speak with such passion, and I keep feeling bolder every time I share the gospel. God is good.

Teach Pray Love

Besides the 2 student retreats I've gotten to go on in the last month, I've had opportunities to pray, teach and share the gospel.

InterVarsity trained me in prayer ministry during two overnighters this fall, and I've taken every opportunity to put it into practice. I've planned for it in student meetings, but I've also done it spontaneously when I realized they needed a word from God. I've even taken it off campus, praying with people from church. I'm part of the Urbana prayer ministry team. I'll pray with students at our national missions conference this December, listening with them for what God has to say, how he wants to heal them, or how they need to respond. God has already brought healing to identity, abuse, deep childhood issues, unforgiveness, and fear. Praise Jesus! I'm excited to see what he does at Urbana, and grateful to have another tool in my belt for ministry. Please pray for me, that I'd be diligent in my own walk with God so I don't burn out, and that I'd have ears to hear the Lord.

I spoke at UH's Large Group meeting earlier this month. I felt like God wanted me to teach from Mark 6, but I wasn't sure about what exactly. And then it hit me - I needed to challenge students to depend on God. Something I fail to do regularly. Why this passage God? It was good for my soul though. From the passage, I showed students our need to depend on God for authority in work/ministry/life, for rest, and for compassion. Please pray for me and for UH's students to depend on God in all things.

The week before Thanksgiving, I drove to SFA. We hit the ground running with conversational evangelism. I taught the 8 gathered students how to strike up spiritual conversations, then sent them out in pairs. Later, I heard one student, Morgan, was so nervous she thought she was going to throw up the whole day. But all 8 students came back gushing! While no one decided to follow Jesus that day, they connected with new people and realized how easy it is to talk to strangers about the important stuff in life - God's love and grace and salvation. Later that night, I studied Luke in SFA's Wednesday Small Group and went to a poetry night. The next day, I met with some of the students 1-on-1 and left joyful at what God is doing in Nacogdoches.

I'll be going out with my Associate Regional Director, Andrea Thomas, and any InterVarsity students at A&M that we can round up for conversational evangelism this Friday. Definitely pray for that too!

Thanksgoween

So much happening around here! But I'm feeling like I should be more committed to updating y'all so you can actually pray for what's happening; hopefully you'll see more of me on here. For this post, I wanted to show you some Halloween pics and share Thanksgiving stories. Tomorrow, I'll fill in some gaps on what's been happening on campus.

My totally awesome pumpkin!

Kyle's creativity at work! We love decorating our house for Halloween. It gets scary when it's dark, and we keep slowly adding to the collection by buying everything half off after Halloween each year. Which is how we got this:

Jack may look forlorn, but he's actually wagging his tail, waiting to go outside. We've never dressed him up before, but we couldn't pass up a hot dog costume for our weiner lab. My staff partner Ben suggested we get a lab coat for him to finish off the costume.

The first half of Thanksgiving week, we flew to Alabama to see the Holley's - Tag and Allison, Emma and Aubrie (our nieces, age 5 and 3). Aubrie says I'm nice and Uncle Kyle is silly. He sometimes twists his ball cap around his head. So silly. We ate well - home-fried chicken wings, Thanksgiving dinner with family and friends, and a night out for Allison and Tag's anniversary. I was laid out for a day with back pain. But the next day, we went to the playground. We pretended to be monkeys and ran away from evil Uncle Kyle, then trapped him by burying his shoes in pebbles. Emma helped us escape to the hippo. Very exciting!

The second half of the week, we stayed with my parents and brother north of Dallas. We watched the James Bond movie (awesome!) on Thursday, and gathered for Thanksgiving on Friday with the extended family. My cousin Sarah is a student athletic trainer at TCU and had to be in Austin for the football game with that other school on Thursday. I also got some great deals at JCPenney's on Black Friday. And I got to see lots of upsets in football all week - so much fun to watch!

Worship Talk

At AgIV's Large Group last Thursday, I opened with this story I wrote:

Imagine you graduated college a decade or two ago, you’ve moved to a small town - one stop light, one school, one grocery store. You head to the grocery store in the middle of the day, when no one you know will be there, because everyone's been gossiping about you, and in a small town, that really means everyone. You're short on cash, but your grocery list is long. You hope you have enough. Is it your imagination, or is the grocery stocker giving you a dirty look? So you may have moved in with somebody new right after your divorce, so what? Is it really everyone's business? You get to the check-out line, and in front of you is a guy you've never seen before. Maybe a visitor, or just moved to town. But then he turns around and starts talking to you. And not just about the weather. He actually asks you if you'll buy him a Coke. And when you laugh at him and say no, he tells you that if you knew who he was, you'd be asking him for a Coke. And not just one Coke, but a lifetime supply of Coke. So you ask him who he is, thinking he must be the president of Coke or something. And he tells you - a travelling preacher. A travelling preacher! Hah! Well, if he can afford to buy you a lifetime supply of Coke, he must be a swindler. I mean, who is this guy? So you ask him to give you the lifetime supply of Coke. Who wouldn't? Even if you don't like Coke, who’d turn that down? Preacher man tells you to go get your spouse. And when you say you don't have one, he says you're right. You've been married a few times, and you’re shacked up with someone new right now. Well that freaks you out a little. You start backing away and say you don't believe in going to church and you're just fine with doing good and worshiping God in your own way at home. And preacher dude actually agrees with you. This is what he says, "The Baptists and the Presbyterians and the Methodists and the Pentecostals and all those Bible church folks have got the wrong focus. It's not about going to church, worshiping God in a building with guitar and piano and drums, and Powerpoint slides with cool backgrounds. It's not about Hillsong or David Crowder or even hymns from past centuries. It's about knowing God the Father, and worshiping him in spirit and in truth. That's it. It's that simple."

It's loosely based on Jesus' encounter with a Samaritan woman, from John 4. I focused in on 4:19-26, helping students to dig a little into what it means to worship in spirit and in truth. I told them a lot, "Either you're worshiping, or you're not." It sounds like semantics, but it's true - everywhere you go you can worship God, and everything you do can be worship if you know God and are choosing to worship him. But even singing worship songs in church is not worship if you're just going through the motions out of habit or because you need to do it to look good to yourself or others. So, "Either you're worshiping God, or you're not."

Summer Time Small Group

Wow, super late on this. I hardly ever get pictures off my camera, which means I take forever to get around to posting them. Check out pictures of our last Bible study in Joshua this summer!

I loved delving into the life of Joshua and seeing God deliver on his promise to the Israelites. A couple lessons woven throughout the book:

• God is the one fighting; we need to be strong and courageous, obedient, and remember his word and his deeds.
• Sin has consequences. Not just for us, but for everyone around us, too.
• Often we settle for less than what God has for us. For whatever reason (fear, laziness, a lack of vision), we get stuck.
• God welcomes people into the Israelites. Even as he commanded them to kill or drive out whole people groups, he welcomes the faithful few.

Back in the Saddle Again

I took a break from blogging this summer, in case you didn't notice :P

I'll write a blog on our summer Small Group and a blog on what's coming up on campus next week. I'll probably also fill you in on the books I've read this summer - so many good ones!

But right now, I'm at "Fund Development 201" for IV staff. We watched a video of Henri Nouwen speaking about how our identity is beloved children of God, not in what we do, what others say about us, or what we have. Instead of allowing an experience of imperfect love or lack of love turn into bitterness, we need to allow God to use it to prune us and bring us back to God's first love for us.

Tonight we'll contact people to see if they're interested in giving to what God's doing on campus. Pray for me that I'm bold, loving, and clear about my vision.

The Veritas Forum

The Veritas Forum just posted the recording of Os Guinness here at Texas A&M back in February. Here's the link. Let me know your thoughts!

I'd love for y'all to pray with me and for me during RecWeek, May 12-25. Students show up tonight! I'm so excited! We'll have 250 students each week at Camp Buckner near Austin, TX. A&M will be here the first week. Pray for love for one another and vision for next year. Pray also for 4 students from Stephen F. Austin who are planting a chapter, that my staff partner Ben and I are working with. Both weeks, I'll staff the Small Group Leader Track. We teach students how to lead Bible studies, create and shepherd missional community, and take risks in evangelism and prayer. Many students will lead their first Bible study and outreach at RecWeek. Pray for students to leave with the "heart and how-to" of being a Small Group Leader. Finally pray for staff. There's about 45 of us over the 2 weeks, and it's a lot of good, hard Kingdom work we'll be doing. Could you prayer Isaiah 30:15, 18 over us? I just finished setting up the book table and planning our evening fellowship times with Ben. Now I'm off to finish prepping a talk I'll give tomorrow on all the components of a good inductive, community-led Bible study.

Sharing our Stories

Stories are powerful. Jesus was a master storyteller. My students and I on the other hand - we're still learning. But two of the women I discipled this year shared their testimonies in the last two weeks, and it was powerful.

Cristina shared her story at our Annual Fundraising Banquet in Houston. She came to Christ a year and a half ago at a national LaFe conference (LaFe is IV's Latino specific ministry). Her story was moving, and she shared it all - growing up in a broken family, a family friend blaming her parents' impending divorce on her and her brother, trying to grow up quickly and be in control, it all being too much, attempting suicide twice. Friends reached out to her, and she moved into her RA's dorm room. Her RA was Ebay, one of our Small Group Leaders. Cristina sat in the Bible study and experienced loving community. She stuck around, despite her doubts and fears. This semester, she went to IV's Mexico mission trip over Spring Break, she's been reaching out to her coworkers and old friends, and she danced to a worship song in front of over 400 students at Breakthrough, our spring weekend training conference. Next year, Cristina will be a Small Group Leader.

Shannon came to the Banquet and heard Cristina speak. She thought God was calling her to finally share, so she did at our Core Meeting last week. Next year, Shannon will help with worship team and hopefully disciple some freshmen.

I foolishly shared Shannon's story without her permission, so I've now deleted it. If you read it before I took it down, please don't pass it along. As I said above, stories are powerful, and I don't want Shannon's story to be used in any way other than what God has called her to use it for. Please forgive me for my rashness in publishing it. Thanks for your understanding.

It's been humbling and exciting to be a part of both of their stories. Thanks for supporting ministry to these two, and to many other students!

The End of Sexual Identity

Before Sexy Pizza, I looked through my bookshelves to see what I could brush up on. I found several books on sex and relationships I've read this year but haven't discussed on the blog.

So here's the first: The End of Sexual Identity by Jenell Williams Paris. Paris' main point is that sex is a big deal, but it isn't, too. Sex is meant as a good gift from God, for reproduction and intimacy, powerful to bring happiness or disappointment. But it's also not such a big deal - it's not meant to be part of our identity. On our calling, she wrote, "We're responsible not only for what we do sexually, but for what we make of sex. In working together to make meanings and practices that demonstrate sexual wholeness and holiness in our time and place, we extend an invitation to acknowledge the myriad ways that sex is (not) a big deal" (13). She asks us to think critically and looks at different cultures from an anthropologist's perspective, offering insight and asking out-of-the-box questions. She discusses sexual desire, sexual holiness, heterosexuality, homosexuality, and celibacy.

Two things still stand out. First, holding up perpetual sexual bliss in marriage as the reward for pre-marital chastity is unfair and unhelpful. It's not guaranteed. Sex, like any part of life, can sometimes be wonderful, and can sometimes be hard.

Second, we've allowed the pattern of this world, the way our culture thinks, to shape the conversation. We use labels (heterosexual, homosexual, virgin, celibate, adulterer) to identify ourselves and others. But "what you want is not a message about who you are" (96). Our identity is beloved human being. "Even though changing sexual desire may seem to be a thoroughly Christian approach, it often eclipses other biblical teachings about desire: that it is fickle, often conflicted and, even for devout believers, not always under our control... When desire is uncoupled from identity, we can consider the question of change in a more straight-forward way" (99-100).

It's a short read, but looking over it again, I'm reminded of tensions I was left with. After reading a paradigm-challenging book like this, I wonder - how do we go forward? If you're ready to consider sexuality from a new perspective, asking new questions, not debating the typical hackneyed issues, this book might be for you.

A Fool for Christ Conversation

I just met with one of my students to help her think through how to share the gospel with a friend of hers. He belongs to the Baha'i Faith; they've already had a conversation about some of what he believes about truth, morality, and God, and she's hoping to talk with him again tonight.

It was really enjoyable to talk about all the different topics she could approach with him - the nature of man (good or evil), the physical reality of Christ's resurrection, and our need for grace. She's hoping to ask him why Christianity would need to be reinterpreted by the Baha’ullah, their original prophet. Their basic premise is that all religions are reinterpreted by the Baha'ullah, who provides the truth we need for our time to move forward in our "evolution." I think it's interesting Baha'is believe they must do things to try to get closer to God; another works-based religion seems like a step back from grace and the free gift of salvation in Christ, instead of a step forward "evolutionary"-wise.

Do you have any resources or advice or stories about sharing the gospel with Baha'is I could pass onto her?

Sexy Pizza

Students gathered last Thursday to ask questions about sex and relationship while grubbin' on some pizza. Their biggest questions were about relationships; many of them haven't heard much about how to even pursue a relationship, much less what to do once you're in one. And many of the messages they've heard, even Christian ones, seem a little off. So we got to give them some good, Biblical advice on loving each other whether you're dating or married, and God's perspective on relationships.

It was really great to have 3 different panelists to talk with them: my staff partner with Asian American InterVarsity, Jeff Mabute; my chapter building coach and Associate Regional Director, Andrea Thomas; and my husband, Kyle Boatsman. They all had different perspectives and built on each other's answers well. Andrea plugged 3 books: Real Sex by Lauren Winner, Sex God by Rob Bell, and Wired for Intimacy by William Struthers. I got to moderate, and I'm excited to continue the conversation with students in weeks to come.

Fools For Christ

Being a fool doesn't sound great. But 1 Corinthians says folly is the way to go!

Students fasted and prayed yesterday. Then they gathered at my house to watch some training videos on how to transition into gospel conversations, why we should actually invite someone to follow Jesus after talking about spiritual matters, and how to make a clear invitation. They've committed to risk looking foolish, share the gospel, and make an invitation to follow Jesus with at least one of their friends before April 15.

On Thursday, April 5, we're doing something to help students have those conversations. We're inviting our friends to "Sexy Pizza" that night to grab a slice and ask their questions about sex and relationships. Our students struggle to invite their friends well, so I'll be working with my students in the next couple days to do that.

Last year, Seth invited Ryan to movie night, and he started attending a Small Group. A summer coworker called David out of the blue minutes after we left dinner to begin our fast, asking David to share the gospel. Since November, Hannah had led a GIG with Jason who wanted to know how you can believe God is in control when bad things happen. During Fools For Christ, she asked, "Where do you see yourself at this point?" He responded, "I'm ready to jump in."

Please pray for:

• students to be courageous, see and take opportunities, and share the Truth in love
• their friends to listen and maybe even decide to follow Jesus
• the Sexy Pizza panel members, for peace as they address hard questions and to have good, grace-filled answers that get students thinking

Messed Up Messages

I’ve been pondering two messages my generation heard constantly growing up. “You can do anything you want to.” And self-esteem. But I think as we grew up those two messages twisted into something very different than the adults around us intended. Many from my generation, though they may not voice this, believe that if we’re not doing the best thing we are (or at least think we are) capable of, that somehow we’ve fallen short. That we’re not living great lives. You can hear it in the tone of voice when someone tells you what they do for a living. Since most of us didn’t end up being ballerinas or athletes or artists or firemen or the president of the United States, we feel like we’ve settled. Because our esteem, our worth, is in our self, when we haven’t lived up to the dreams and expectations of our youth, we don’t have a self we think is worthy.

I think that’s the natural result of those two messages, especially when used together. What do you think? And is this something you see in my generation, or am I making it up out of my head? Leave me a comment.

Flammable: Handle with Care

The Fire of the Word by Chris Webb was an excellent read. His writing was simply refreshing and engaging. I was challenged to stop treating Scripture as something to be dissected so I can digest it easier, but as an encounter with a lover. Analysis can be a good first step, but we have to go further. He gave some practical exercises to do that: several months of daily Bible readings to ponder and journal on, with different directions each week.

He tackled Scripture's inerrancy by saying that we need to start viewing the Bible as a book that God is whispering through to us, "Look: I am here." Instead of bickering over whether all the words are correct, we need to allow God to meet us in the words. It certainly doesn't address the questions surrounding textual criticism, but it cuts to the core of the matter - will we allow God to be authoritative? His word to transform us? His love to overwhelm us?

He also addressed the resurgence of lectio divina, especially in Evangelical circles. Apparently, we've missed the point. It's not just to read the passage slowly and prayerfully, listening for a word or phrase to us. Some of the repetitions are meant to point us toward allegory and Christ's presence in every text. I had no clue.

There's actually a conference in Denver called The Fire of the Word May 4-5 with Chris Webb and several other authors who are championing spiritual disciplines for today. I can't go, but I'm looking forward to those daily readings. I hope to start them this summer.

Leadership Discernment

This week has been full of interviews and praying. It's strange for me to think that most "hiring" processes don't involve prayer. Whereas, if we didn't rely on prayer, we'd be shooting ourselves in the foot.

Four students are considering Small Group Leader positions, which includes leading a weekly Bible study, helping a community form, reaching out to new students, and growing members in witness, prayer, and possibly leadership. For the seven students we didn't feel were ready for leadership, we decided on a few growth steps we thought they should take.

Last year, we had to ask if the students applying were even missional. This year, we shifted to asking if students were mature and influential, actually leading people already. Not everyone has really owned the mission of God as their calling and privilege; most of them still tend to focus on creating and attending Christian activities. But they're more aware of what God's mission actually is, and they're more interested in seeing it happen through them. We saw culture change in just one year!

Good Christian B******

I watched the pilot for GCB (what they’ve shortened the title to so they can stay PC) early last week. It was mildly funny, but I was unsettled and sad after watching it. Think Desperate Housewives goes to Texas and gets religion. The main antagonist, Carlene, quotes lots of Scripture out of context and makes pronouncements about God not liking a failure and how Jesus wouldn’t hang out with thieves and prostitutes in her neighborhood.

The nicest, most mature person on the show was the protagonist, Amanda. Recently widowed from an adulterous Ponzi schemer, she moves her 2 kids back to Dallas to live with her mother in Highland Park. Her old high school “friends” are afraid of losing their husbands to her, and want some revenge for all the torture she put them through. After spying and plotting, they all go to church. Then they spy and plot some more.

I felt uncomfortable because, gross caricature though it was, I feel these same tensions in the middle-class churches I’ve attended. Power struggles, desperation for security and comfort, wanting to be justified and even managing a little revenge against someone who slanders me. I can only imagine how they play out in churches filled with rich people – the temptations must be unbelievable. But here’s the thing: most Christians I hang out with are on some level trying to follow Jesus, albeit very imperfectly. And I think that’s what makes me angriest – the Christians in this show weren’t trying to follow Christ. They weren’t fighting their temptations, trusting the Holy Spirit for their well-being, or loving their enemies. Let’s not even talk about sacrificing for the poor among us – there aren’t any poor anywhere near their church!

But Amanda didn’t love her enemies either; she decided to gossip about Carlene through prayer during church, the exact thing Carlene had done to Amanda at the beginning of the show. That’s who they portray as the heroine? As I said, Amanda is the nicest, most mature person. But being nice and mature doesn’t qualify you for God’s Kingdom. Having a relationship with Jesus does, but that relationship means more than being nice and mature – it’s a call to lay down your life. About the only thing I could agree with in the show was when Amanda told Carlene, “How dare you call yourself a Christian!”

Musings on Multiethnicity

At the Multiethnic Staff Conference, God revealed kernels of truth during our time in prayer, conversation, and speakers' teaching and Bible studies over Acts 2, 6, 8, 15, and 20. Here are some of the questions I’m grappling with:

What got us here will not get us there, so what do we do now?

Is God’s fire consecrating us to share the gospel in others’ heart languages?

Taking care of widows led to priests, a hard, unreached community, joining the early church. Who are the “widows” on campus?

As we do cross-cultural mission, will we allow our theological convictions to be challenged? Will we lead wisely and prophetically, asking all (my people too) to give up cultural particulars to live attractively so students can hear the gospel?

Is the gospel I share good news to non-Christians? To my students? To me!?! How have I used a one-size-fits-all gospel that may actually be bad news to some?

God will meet me when I stay in dissonance. Am I running away?

What unpopular controversies do we need to engage in? We missed out on the civil rights movement, and now we have little trust built with black churches.

Are we transforming students into IV staff workers or witnesses?

Will we find a new way forward in a changing world that is no longer tied to resource-dependent, financially-driven, business-oriented ways of thinking?

Will I count how many blind people see, how many poor we proclaimed the gospel to, how many oppressed we released, not just conversions and demographics?

How do I help students see the Biblical basis for multiethnicity? Can I help students of every ethnicity (including white!) see their culture's beauty and besetting sins? Will they love those different from them, and not assume we’re all the same?

Who isn’t at the table in my chapter? Why?

Will I engage the sin of racism? I need to pray, take my own journey to healing, develop cross-cultural friendships, expose the invisible, and share my power. I need physical, emotional, and spiritual wholeness to do this for the long haul.

Pretty intense four days, huh? It was a blessing to be there; I’m grateful senior staff recommended me as one of our region's attendees. I feel responsible to bring back what God gave me to bless other staff and students; I’m praying I do.

Hollywood, here I come!

(Cue music) I'm gonna be a star! (Do jazzy dance and singing number, with extras slowly joining in behind me as I head out of town. Like in the most recent Muppets movie).

Okay, so I'm not going to be an actress in Hollywood. Not yet at least...

I'm on my way to Los Angeles for InterVarsity's Multiethnic Staff Conference, March 6-9. I'm hoping to participate in some healing conversations about our racial heritage and identities, see dividing walls broken down as we repent and worship together, and learn ways I can bring the power of the Kingdom in this area back to campus. I'll let you know what happens!

Leadership Ellipse

I finished The Leadership Ellipse by Robert Fryling this weekend. It's a spiritual formation book for leaders who are worn out from trying to balance the tension between our inner relationship with God and our outer ministry to others. He introduces the idea of an ellipse, an oval to those of us who aren't geometry enthusiasts. Ovals have two focal points, unlike a circle with just one big bull's eye in the middle. Too often, leaders burn out from neglecting their relationship with God, feeling like hypocrites and frauds in their work. Or leaders retreat for a time and return refreshed, but without many ideas on how to bring what they experienced into the rest of their lives. But authenticity by itself isn't much to shoot for - we need transformation. So Fryling wrote a book to help leaders develop "a harmony of our inner and outer lives that together are in harmony with God and his purposes in us and in the world."

His first two sections were excellent, but since I've read a number of spiritual formation books over the last year, the practices he suggested weren't new. Excellent, but not new to me. The last section was particularly helpful for me, though.

He talked about our fears and self-pity - seeing ourselves like grasshoppers. I know, weird metaphor. It's from Numbers 13:33; you can check out the whole story here. Basically, some of the Israelites charged with spying out the Promised Land came back and reported there was no way they could even hope of taking it over - there were giants living there, and they reported, "We seemed to ourselves like grasshoppers, and so we seemed to them.” Fryling believes the practice of wholeheartedness can address the self-pity behind these fears.

He also challenged leaders to be attentive to the people around them, not just the structures they're trying to keep or develop. I think this was a good reminder to me of the pull I've been feeling to actually hang out in my students' environment, check their status updates on Facebook, and not just ask the "spiritual check-up" questions when we meet.

His last chapter, on being a grateful creature, offered a definition of leadership as "defining reality and saying thank you." One of my Area Director Josh Howell's favorite sayings is, "Reality is our best friend." Being honest with ourselves and students about what's really going on, where our choices lead, and that things are either much better or much worse (depending on the student's outlook) than they usually think. My chapter building coach and Associate Regional Director Andrea Thomas has told me, "Bring the fun!" We weren't celebrating at our leadership meetings when something went well, or just that we were getting to partner with God on campus. So we started having "forced fun" in the middle of leadership meetings and spending time rejoicing and praising God during prayer meetings. I think I'll try just outright thanking students more, too.

38 Days Later...

It's been 5 weeks and 3 days since my last post. Whoo.

I've met a few more times with the guy from the New Year's Resolution station to study the book of John.

At Breakthrough, our regional conference Feb. 10-12, I directed the Word track where 125 students learned how to study the Bible inductively, apply what they discover to their lives, and hopefully fall in love with God and his Word. I also managed the book table there, selling lots of InterVarsity Press books that could impact students for a long time to come. At least, I know they do that for me.

I helped publicize and host the Veritas Forum. At lunch, Os Guinness shared about the problem of suffering and evil, and that night, he discussed the great need for civil but truthful conversations about our most divisive issues.

I started helping the Asian American InterVarsity chapter, because their staff had to go to the hospital. He's doing a lot better now, and will be coming back this weekend, but the doctors still aren't sure what caused the health problems.

I've had one cold, and I'm in the middle of another. We moved all the IV stuff into our new home office (it's so cool!). Kyle took me to see Moulin Rouge - The Ballet. And Jack, our dog, has not had a bath in a really long time. He's kinda stinky.

Watership Down

Okay, this isn't Christian nonfiction, or a book on how to do your job better, or anything like that. But I just finished Watership Down by Richard Adams, and it was delightful! I had to share.

I grew to love the bunnies in this book, and I miss being in the world of Hazel and Fiver, Bigwig and Pipkin. The book follows the adventures of a band of rabbits who manage to escape the destruction of their home, only to face many more obstacles trying to find a safe place for themselves. The rabbits have their own language, they do some un-rabbit-like things, and some have the gift of foreknowledge. But other than that, it's set in the real world. Adams did a great job of immersing you into the life of rabbits, even making up rabbit legends. It's filled with suspense and adventure, but also joy and goodness. If you enjoy children's lit at all, you should read this.

New Year's Resolutions Lead to Suffering

Last week was intense, filled with conversations and events, but it was so good to talk about Jesus!

I just ate lunch with a guy I met at our New Year's Resolution proxe station. Last week, we spoke about changes he wanted to make in his life (like deeper connections with his friends) and how God wanted to help him with his resolutions, but also wanted much bigger change in his life: reconciliation with God and others. He shared that he grew up Catholic, but his family had drifted away, and only in the last few years had he re-examined religion. He felt like you couldn't be sure of things; there is a God, but faith in the Christian God wasn't something he was ready to jump onto.

I invited him to continue the conversation, he said yes, and we met today. I showed him Psalm 88 and Romans 8:18-39. It was challenging and enjoyable to talk about how our God responds to suffering. Of course, I still struggle with those same questions, and it's always good to talk to someone honestly dealing with them. We'll continue to meet this semester to look at Jesus in the book of John. Please pray he chooses faith over fear, and finds in God the truth, grace, and comfort he desperately needs.

This week, I'm meeting with several others I had conversations with. Keep praying students do the same - this isn't their full time job, and they don't have a lot of experience doing it, so it's easier for them to find less scary things to fill their time with, like work and studying!

January Prayer Requests

I completely forgot to post these!

• Pray for our events.
  
  • gospel conversations at our New Year's Resolutions table
    
  • big missional prayers and community at Coffee House
    
  • a smooth and worshipful Large Group meeting (tonight!) where I'll speak on Jesus healing a leper and our calling to live into a new identity as the church
    
  • community, outreach, and the Ephesians study in our Small Groups
    
  • fun activities this weekend and next that students actually invite their friends to
• Pray for great follow up - that students actually do it, and make connections that last.
  
• Pray that through all this, members grow more as the family of God, setting the table together and inviting others to join in the feast, and that some may take them up on the invitation and be saved through our efforts.
  
• Pray for good recruitment to our next big things. We're hoping for 18 students at Breakthrough, a training retreat February 10-12. We're hoping 8 students use their Spring Break in March to go on a mission trip to Mexico (sign-up deadline 1/27).

A Few Christmas Memories

I still haven't downloaded Washington, D.C. pictures from our camera. Hopefully I will soon...

Here are some other pics from Christmas, though! The first three are from our Christmas prom party at InterVarsity's Regional Staff Conference, taken by Mike Karim. The first is most of the folks on my Area Team, staff from Houston and College Station.

Here are some of my lovely staff friends.

And in this one, my area team has just finished a speed puzzle challenge, one of 3 challenges to prove who is the best area and win a dinner out during our 2 week end-of-year regional camp, RecWeek.

Finally, here are a few shots of my family after the tradition we call Grab Bag. Fun, random toys are stuffed in a garbage bag, then we go around the circle, each drawing something out (no peeking!) until the bag is empty. And then madness ensues.

It's 2012 Already!

It's been a month and a half since I wrote anything - eek! Here's the rundown of what I've been up to:

We wrapped up the year with a fabulous Christmas party. We celebrated Jesus' birth, some students and I were in an evangelistic skit (no pictures of that, sorry!), and we said goodbye to Hannah (graduated in December) and Rodrigo (returning to Mexico after a semester studying abroad).

I went to our Regional Staff Conference. We got training in Bible study skills and had a Christmas prom party.

I spent a week focused on fundraising. I'm up to 92% of my budget! And I'm still waiting to hear back from some folks. Unfortunately, giving to our alumni account decreased. If you could pray for me and other staff to faithfully ask, and alumni to follow God's lead in giving, I'd appreciate it.

Kyle and I traveled to Prosper, TX to see my family, then flew up to Washington, D.C. to visit Kyle's sister and brother-in-law. So much sightseeing! I'll post a link to pics once we get them online.

We got back this weekend for a short breather, and I'm off again tomorrow for Area Team meetings, with the staff from College Station and Houston.

I read a lot over break, and I'll write some reviews of those. I'll also update y'all on prayer requests before school starts in a week. Thanks for your partnership in the gospel!