Boundaries

I just finished reading Boundaries, by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend. I wanted to loan it to a student, but I’d only read the first half several years ago. So I reread it.

I know some who think it goes too far, that it’s not Biblical to set boundaries, and that the ideas in the book have been used to hurt people. I can see how that last one is possible, but the second half of the book focuses on ways to set boundaries slowly with lots of different relationships and areas of your life. The authors explained a balanced, Biblical understanding of healthy boundaries. I think what they challenge readers to do is a much-needed correction to our society’s way of dealing with conflict. And the church’s way of demanding more, more, more. The trick is balancing hard and fast boundaries with grace and love.

It was good for me to be reminded of areas of my life I need to set boundaries, especially with work and with myself. But I was also encouraged by how God has grown me in boundary-setting in various relationships.

I've been using some of the truths with students in discipleship. One student needed to hear that healthy anger is supposed to be a sign that someone has crossed a boundary and hurt me. Several others needed to know they were responsible to people, but not for them. I was happy to hand this book to my student, and I think many of us could benefit from the truth in Boundaries.